![]() Between listening to Taylor Swift and your shit, 99% of people with a three-digit IQ (including metalheads) will bite their tongues, jam in some earplugs to dampen the sound, and listen to that vocoder autotuned buffooness – shitty music, certainly, but galaxies from your shit albums whose track names refer to diseases you only ever heard of since your sisters, the obese HIV positive ex-prostitutes, left behind their medical records after their suicide by overdose of KFC chicken wings. To the others: you don’t play death metal, losers. ![]() (incidentally, this isn’t a diss against Devourment, whom I don’t consider part of the slam death cancer crowd and who are one of the few worthwhile bands playing this “style”) “ Self Disembowelment” ? “ Autoerotic Asphyxiation” ? Those are great ideas ! Now put your money where your cum stains are. So here’s my advice to those crap bands, those Gorgoroth equivalents with sodomized sow voices, with their pseudo-gore lyrics and their logos stolen from Goosebump! books, or even Harry Potter for the more retarded amongst them… go get fucked by your transvestite mothers (again).Īctually do the things you write about. ![]() It’s a fact.īut within the death metal umbrella itself exists a “sub-culture” derived from the worst stereotypes that belittle both the genre itself and its participants (see what the “mainstream” thinks of typical metalheads), and give it its image of “music for down syndrome losers”, while in reality it’s the exact opposite.ĭeath metal is Onward to Golgotha, it’s Locked up in Hell, it’s The Epilogue to Sanity… and unfortunately, this musical style is literally (shit)stained by its association with what we call the “ slamming brutal death metal” sub-genre (usually shortened to “slam death” because their fans are retarded and can’t memorize four words), which purports to be death metal but is, in fact, only “death metal” in name.Īll “slam death” bands are similar, their albums are identical, they all copy the same riff – the “breakdown” from Suffocation’s Liege of Inveracity, reproduced a million times by musicians with the IQ of Erik Danielsson or Phil Anselmo, and not having one tenth of Suffocation’s talent. Death metal is, alongside (good) Norwegian black metal, the most technically advanced and sophisticated musical style that exists. Let’s be very clear straight from the start. ![]() “Slam Brutal Death Metal” = Music for Retards. ![]()
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